fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize