Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
Oscar is the man. He keeps getting pictures of hot nude women with messages in spanish saying "i hope you like it" sent to his phone
whose oscar?
the baller who i guess decided to give out a fake number at the bar last weekend. luckily that fake number was mine. i have enough porn to last me until next month.
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
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