DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
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