my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
Randomize
