kristin has been a bad kristin
There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
Randomize
