Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
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