So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
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