she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
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