"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
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