All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
Randomize
