It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
I just checked and if you bring a picture of your ex they will shred it and give you a free 'hater shot'. Would it be too much to print off one of their wedding pictures and bring it?
I really love that you're not going the 'why am I not married and having a kid yet?' route, but rather 'thank god I dodged that bullet'
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