im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
Randomize
