be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
Randomize
