I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Randomize
