saw you had $9 in your checking acct, left $20 on your dresser so you won't be a whore this weekend
im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
Randomize
