I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
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