I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
Randomize
