operation harelip BJ is a go
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
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