My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
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