She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
Randomize