he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
There was a selfie of you in the dark pointing at the camera with a duck face. You sent it to my 60 year old mother with the caption "you behave"
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
Randomize
