in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
You tend to look at life differently when you wake up to nutella vomit all over your room with no recollection of how it got there
You know how to spell recollection?
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
He ain't mine yet. Gotta have a third date before I pee on him and mark territory.
Oh. Wait. That happened on the second date.
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
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