This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
When the neighbors threatened to call the cops, he yelled at them that American laws didnt apply to him because he was Danish. He then sang his own version of "America fuck yeah" along to daft punk, then fell down the porch steps. Can we keep him?!?!
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
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