these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
Randomize
