Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
My vagina is officially offended.
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
Randomize
