Whoa Z and x make the same sound
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
Randomize
