Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
Best news of the day: the hot chick at the funeral was NOT related to me... Thank god
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
I need moral support for this bender
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
I am naked and annoyed.
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
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