are you so shy because you have an std?
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
I got kicked out of an open bar wedding reception. The bride "felt threatened" by my presence. Not my fault she's ugly
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
Randomize
