my dad wants uyo to call him right now...reverse drunk dialing
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
This morning I woke up in the entrance of a retirement home. Memory fragments from last night: making it rain with the contents of my wallet over the bridge, getting hit by a car, and a lot of running.
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
Randomize
