My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
Randomize
