i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
Randomize