It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
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