i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
