He kissed a someone with a penis
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
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Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
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I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
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