dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.
Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
