11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.