I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
I guess i tried to text 911 last night with "someone stole my bong." Thank god that doesn't work...
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies