My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
Randomize