Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
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