Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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