ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found puke in my bra..
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
Randomize