Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
Randomize