Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Randomize
