belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Randomize
