I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
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