just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
I faked an abortion last night.
I skipped work to stalk him.
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
Randomize