how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
I just got hit in the face by an old lady love handle.
a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
we found you in the kitchen at five am trying to make a vodka omelette. you said you didn't want to live in a world where your two favourite things couldn't be together.
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
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