Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
On today's episode of "What the Shit Did I Do Last Night," drunk me deleted ALL of the text messages I've ever had. Awesome.
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
Randomize
