i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
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