That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
Damn victory sex feels great
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
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