I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
Randomize
