Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
Randomize